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David Roy's blog - comments
Posted by David Roy on: July 26, 2007
Eight dos for men using dating websites
Women on dating websites always seem to be swamped with tons of emails from men who want to get to know them or date them. For that reason, the competition is fierce among men online. To get responses from women, you must find a way of standing out from the crowd.
Women get plenty of messages like this one: "I like your profile and would like to know more about you. Look at my profile and let me know what you think. Cheers! Bob." That's just plain boring and not particularly attractive. It doesn't give her any real reason to reply.
Here are eight things you can do that will help you get more responses from women on Internet dating websites.
1. Do run a spell-check. Many women are turned off by bad spelling. A spell-check takes only a minute or two, so use it before you send all your messages.
2. Do present honest information. Be honest at all times when dating online. Nobody likes to deal with a liar. You might attract her with lies at first, but in the end you will be the loser when she finds out the truth. You will end up in a situation where you will have to justify why you lied. This will put you in a bad situation and will repulse her.
3. Do read her profile first. Do not email her before you read her profile. Looking only at her picture is not good enough. Make sure that she really interests you—not just physically. Read her profile and send her a short email inspired by what you have read in her profile.
4. Do write something specific. Do not write something generic, such as "I like romantic dinners." Everyone likes that, and it does not say anything about you. Be more specific. Say something like "I love pasta, and Italian is my favorite. Mmmm...spaghetti and meatballs…mmmm...."
5. Do include a good, recent picture of yourself. Put a nice recent photo of yourself on your profile. Most women do not even look at profiles without a photo. Many select the "profiles with photo only" option when setting their search criteria. By having your photo on your profile, you increase your exposure tenfold. Make sure it is a recent, clear photo of you alone.
6. Do respect her wishes if she is not interested. If a woman has the courtesy to reply to you saying that she is not interested, please respect her wishes and do not harass her. She does not have to tell you why. She has told you she is not interested, and on top of that she probably has received dozens of messages from other men interested in knowing more about her. Maybe you can thank her for her reply and then move on.
7. Do choose a clever nickname. Don't choose a violent or sexual nickname. Forget about any nickname that uses "69" or shows any kind of negativity. Women won't be attracted by this. Choose something benign, something attractive that describes a bit about you.
8. Do create an attractive profile and subject headers. Spend some time figuring out who you are and what kind of women interest you, and use that information to complete your profile. Be unique, sincere, honest, and creative, and show your sense of humor if you can.
Many men scare women away just by their attitude, by revealing too much in their emails, by constantly emailing them even if they are not interested, or by trying to attract them with sex. If you are one of these men, you are wasting your time. Instead, use the dos above—they will certainly increase your rate of success.
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